Friday, January 29, 2016


Are you a slave to approval?
Do you constantly worry and stress that someone in your life (work or personal relationships) won't approve of what you do or how you spend your time and/or money?

I was in that trap as a teenager with my parents.

Then I was in that trap with my first husband.

Then I was in that trap as a single mother trying to raise her children the best she could but had many naysayers in my life and very few true supporters of what I was working towards.

I was in this trap with a supervisor at a past job and eventually with the support of others took a stand and filed a complaint of harassment against her. You could say I put on paper things others saw happening but no one had ever truly put it in writing to an authority figure that would /could reprimand this director. I was immediately removed from being her subordinate and though I no longer directly reported to her, I did continue to do some work for her but she had to put it all in writing and go through my new supervisor to schedule my work for her. Speaking up for myself had actually worked. I was amazed and so thankful.

Then I remarried.. and at first it seemed as though he was supportive no matter what, but then it became very apparent after his multiple affairs, money issues, illness and job loss, he always seemed to have a reason to be elsewhere and nothing I did could change him. So glad I woke up from that nightmare!

Well, I can honestly say that today, I do what I can but I do not live to please others and I don't need their approval to survive.

If you spend all your time pleasing others, how on earth will you please yourself?

I have found that when I focus on my business and things that concern me, my business, my finances, I just don't have the time or energy to worry about pleasing others.

Do the right thing, do the healthy thing, set some goals and go for it. The only person you have to answer to is God. No one on this earth has the right to judge you or boss you around unless you give that permission to them. ( I am not saying to be insubordinate and risk your job in any way, but stand up for yourself as kindly as possible.)

Romans 8:31 (KJV)
What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?