Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Seeking Approval

We as humans often seek the approval of others. I suppose it starts when we are little and want a reward from mom/dad for doing something the way they want us to.

When you are learning to walk, talk, eat and in school you do need to conform and learn to do certain things to get along and function in society, school, church and other types of things. 

But when you are a grown-up, why do we continue to seek approval of others? I am guilty of this and have spent years trying to earn the approval of an ex-husband, friend, co-worker, supervisors and others in my life. For the most part, having their approval meant nothing in the end. 

There is a point some people get to in life where they are simply addicted to getting others approval and if someone dislikes them or disagrees with them, they can't or won't handle it and often push you out of their life if you don't "cave in to their way of thinking".

This is also a way to manipulate others and when taken too far can be emotional and even verbal abuse.

Last week, I caught myself seeking someone's approval and it was like a lightbulb went on over my head when I realized that I was choosing to allow recognition from another human determine my opinion of my own self-worth.  I was instantly reminded of something I was told a long time ago. Never judge yourself by other humans, instead the only measuring stick we should use is the Bible. 

It is completely okay to have goals that are similar to others but please don't ever say you want to be just like another person because you don't know what they sacrificed to get what they have.

Spend your free time doing something that makes you happy or serves others, but be sure it is of YOUR CHOOSING and not someone else's wishes.  It is OK to say "NO" at times and tell people your true opinions and it is OK to opt out of gatherings, parties and events you truly don't want to attend.  And you don't have to even give a reason why!

I challenge you to exercise your "No Muscle" and see how good it makes you feel not to have to go to that event you really didn't want to be at anyway. Be honest and Relax this holiday season. I want to see you smiling even if you are just out walking in the park enjoying the cool winter air.

First and foremost I always want my message to be about freedom and overcoming the impossible. With God Nothing is impossible!  Take care of yourself and your family and enjoy the moments because they soon become memories.