Friday, August 22, 2014

Trusted Friends

Do you have a trusted friend that you feel knows you pretty well? Do they know everything you have lived through, survived and overcome?  Are you afraid to tell them the whole story?

Feeling safe enough with people you know is a difficult thing to accomplish. I know this first hand. The first person I told about my abuse laughed in my face and said I was exaggerating and that my husband could not have been that bad. They also said I watched too much "Oprah" in those days.

So, I bottled it up, and didn't openly talk about that life/marriage to anyone in my inner circle until 2005. This is why it has taken me so long to heal. I also quit watching talk shows because I couldn't take hearing all the stories knowing no one would believe my own life story.

First of all, I ask you to pray and ask God to show you someone in your life you can trust with your struggles and issues of your difficult life/marriage/relationships.  The few people that I started sharing with in the past few years are not family but they are Christian women that have kept the confidence all these years.

Second, get in a solid Bible Based church that builds you up and feeds your soul with the Word of God. God can heal any pain we have if we only ask him to.

Third, Love yourself and forgive yourself. Whatever you have been through, whether it was physical, sexual, mental, financial, social abuse is NOT YOUR FAULT. The person that put you down will have to answer for their actions on Judgement Day. Learning to love myself and forgive myself has been very difficult and filled with tears and healing along the past 2-3 years of my life.

Fourth, Find a group that you can help. Helping others through fundraising, charity work or even putting up the tables after events at church can be service to others and will help you get through the roughest times because you are focusing on others and not yourself.

Fifth, know that I believe you and support you!  Share my blog with others that would benefit from my story. I only tell the story to show others that there is a LIFE after being abused. Be a Blessing!

If you are in immediate danger, please call 911. The domestic violence hotline is 1-800-799-7233 and I encourage you to call them for assistance too.