Wednesday, June 4, 2014


Merriam-Webster defines the word "alone" 3 ways:
: without anyone or anything else : not involving or including anyone or anything else : separate from other people or things
: without people that you know or that usually are with you
: feeling unhappy because of being separated from other people

Lately, I totally feel completely alone. The divorce has been 'on the books' for almost a year & I just celebrated a year at my accounts payable job yesterday. I live with my parents and my daughter right now yet every day I feel utterly and completely alone.

I deal with these feelings by putting on Christian music in the car on my 45 minute one-way commute and that perks me up for a great day and a great attitude. I put on a smile as much as possible no matter who or what event might have made me sad or struck me down recently. I try to make time every day to read my Bible and participate in our church's 365 challenge to read the Bible through in a year's time. I have positive statements and Bible verses posted all over my cubicle amidst the pictures of my grown children and their children. 

I am not perfect in my thoughts or actions and I blow up about stuff that makes me mad when I see things done unfairly or people just being mean every day. I chose last year to quit watching the news and that has helped my mood tremendously because I don't get caught up in the journalism and media spin on every crook and story on the newscast. 

I say all this to be brutally honest and clear to my readers about what I deal with every day behind the laptop. I write my life story and current events to help others and show others that if this sinner can overcome her obstacles of depression, anxiety, fear and grow a thriving candle business along the way, You can overcome whatever you are facing. Some days you will take baby steps, some days you will stumble and fall, but getting back up and staying on your path is the true definition of your character (not how many times you fell or disappointed someone). 

If you follow what I write, please contact me and let me know. I hope it blesses you in some way to know that you are not alone even though it appears that way.  God is always with us, God never moves away and is always there holding us. 

Please remember 1-800-799-7233 is the hotline for help if you need a way out of a dangerous situation. Praying for your safety always and know there are many of us on the other side who have survived what you are going through - just reach out.